How to manage exposure to screens in our lives?
June 7th, 2019 by Bjorn Thorson
These days, most parents come home late, tired and disturbed. parent-child Quality time is counted in several minutes per day.
Our absence in our children’s life is causing emotional problems, the more we are not there, the more emotional problems occur.
Families that have set boundaries are capable of managing a better family life. They are providing the basic needs of their children, their physical and emotional needs.
Lack of boundaries/limits equals Increase in emotional/behavioral problems
So, what are boundaries? Teaching for habits, distinguishing between permissible and forbidden, between right and wrong, these boundaries helps us, parents, to manage our anger in the future.
So how do we set these boundaries? Organizing an agenda which is appropriate to the child’s needs and the framework in which he is subject; Limits that would prevent him or her from endangering himself physically and mentally;
The Iron Rules When it comes to setting boundaries correctly: It is crucial to try to explain; Offer alternative ways; Giving reinforcement to proper behavior; Be consistent so as not to confuse, with the possibility of flexibility in exceptional cases.
A limit should be clear – the punishment should be related to behavior and not arbitrary. Do not punish using a punishment that one cannot handle or enforce
The role of children is to constantly challenge boundaries. When they cry it is not a sign that we are abusing them, but a sign that they are checking how serious we are. Therefore, one should not break into a rage. If we break and expose our anger, the child learns that through the crying or the anger we give up and he gets what he wants.
How should you set boundaries? Start from an early age, give direction and a personal example; Eating habits – having meals in regular hours, table habits & cutlery, meals in front of the TV are not allowed. Sleeping habits – safe separation training. we all sleep too little, most of the time due to our exposure to screens.
When we are tired, we tend to be nervous and everything goes much harder. The children’s sleep is essential to growth, memory, attention, and concentration in school, and to the relationship with their brothers and sisters after school time.
How do you start setting boundaries?
Focus on what is most important; Daily consistency until the result is achieved; Gradualism and reinforcement; Clear messages; providing reinforcement are preferable than punishment; Warning before the penalty. The punishment that is relevant to specific behavior rather than the rejection of the child as a whole.
Make the best efforts not to lose control. Loss of control arouses anxiety. Take a deep breath and take the time to respond afterward.
In general, we develop in five areas throughout life: emotional, social, physiological, cognitive and moral. Boundaries train the emotional-social and moral areas.
screens. This is an intriguing subject with no/very low awareness among therapists and/or psychologists until a decade ago.
Sure, we had a TV and a computer, but we could recommend placing these in a central place so parents can have full control over the exposure and content.
Screen exposure is a complex & tough phenomenon, which is getting worse. True, there are many good things in screen exposure – learning, playing, enjoying, communicating with the world, etc.
Use Parental Control Software—because you can’t always be present to limit your child’s screen time, let technology help you. Find a good parental control program and set the number of hours your child should stay in front of screens.
Questodio parental control software, for example, allows you to filter out sites which your child is not allowed to visit. You also receive daily activities of what they’ve been doing—keeping you in total control of your child’s online activities always. This Qustodio review explains more about how the parental program can help you protect your kids from harm as they use the Internet.
Social networks meet our two basic needs – the need for admiration (and what is more rewarding than likes – text /video/picture?) And the need to belong to a certain group.
However, there are also many dangers in social networks – verbal abuse, pedophilia, etc. Today, very young children are exposed to sexual and/or violent material – videos that are transmitted from the moment you give a child a smartphone. premature Exposure, especially when the child is not searching for this kind of information, can cause severe trauma.
Excessive use affects all five areas mentioned above –
Emotional and social abuse. The ability to communicate with others (to listen and express ourselves), to converse, to know, to argue, to make peace, to forgive … Watching telenovelas distorts the perception of marital relationships and in general, and this causes them to be defensive in social gatherings.
This article was written by Sharon Zuntz, Child Psychologist.